Grief and Loneliness Part 2

Here are a couple of Downton Abbey fan-made videos showing examples of how Aidan's grief will be portrayed:

Eating Too Little

As I mentioned in the last post, I felt that Aidan would lose his appetite, and so he would try to eat but little of what he had would be eaten, meaning that there are plenty of left overs on the counter tops in the kitchen.

“Food isn’t as appealing when you’re anxious, worried, or feel hopeless,”

It also means that because there are left overs, any food that is left has gone off, and if Aidan does feel some need to eat, he is likely to eat anything available, even if that means the food he eats has gone out of date.

“Depressed people often wind up eating fast food or whatever they have on hand in their kitchen – such as their last box of cookies,”

Or he will simply result in having cereal, perhaps just picking at the pieces in a bowl without actually willing himself to eat them.

“This can make simple tasks seem overwhelming, so they might eat a bowl of the same type of cereal for three meals a day,”

Depression

With this, he is expressing symptoms of depression, which include:

• moving or speaking more slowly than usual 
• change in appetite or weight (usually decreased, but sometimes increased) 
• constipation 
• unexplained aches and pains
• disturbed sleep (for example, finding it hard to fall asleep at night or waking up very early in the morning)

Isolation

Shutting himself from the world is something that I wanted to express as well, as this is something he has prior to meeting Sky been accustomed to. He is by nature, introverted, but introverts go outside and do things they enjoy, so by having him in solitude because of grief, he not only becomes lonelier, but he also develops the sense of having to forget to move on.

In his isolation he grieves alone, not necessarily the only one grieving for Sky, but he is alone. One of the ways in which coping with grief aside from crying (or not as some people find they can't), is talking. As Aidan is alone, he has no one to talk to, and so doesn't express what he wants to say. 

"You may be too embarrassed or ashamed to let your emotions show in front of others. You may feel isolated, different and apart from everyone else, convinced that no one understands and you must grieve alone...Find time with others to talk, to touch, to receive support. Be honest with others about what you’re feeling. Allow yourself to express your sadness rather than masking it."

However, without anyone to talk to, he ends up suppressing his grief, turning it inwards,

"Suppressing it, avoiding it, or medicating it can all delay and subvert your process...if we are just stuck in bed and not getting on with our lives, or feeling depressed, we may need help from others."

"You are truly stuck when you avoid your sadness. When you avoid its pain and suppress it, grief just goes below your awareness and comes out in other forms...as depression, anger, anxiety and other feelings." 

This is where Sky comes in. In showing Aidan that he is still there, he tries to help Aidan move on, however, it is only when Aidan starts to feel pains in his chest that it becomes clear Aidan is not coping. Sky realises that his health has declined and notices the pain and suffering Aidan is putting himself through. As such, Sky tries to communicate with Aidan by moving items (such as the coat and scarf), without trying to scare him.

However, this causes somewhat of a backlash, as Aidan feels that this activity is causing him to be reminded of Sky more, and so Aidan removes any trace that Sky left behind. Yet this makes the house they lived in very empty, and Aidan finds his emotions worsen, leading to him breaking down. This in itself, where nothing seems left of Sky (apart from the photo), that Aidan can finally let out his crying. But it appears too late, when he suffers a terrible chest pain later on which causes his death.

http://www.webmd.com/depression/features/depression-food-traps?page=2
http://www.nhs.uk/Conditions/Depression/Pages/Symptoms.aspx
http://www.griefhealingblog.com/2012/02/loneliness-and-solitude-in-grief.html
http://www.awakenment-wellness.com/extreme-grief.html
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prolonged_grief_disorder
http://www.surviveyourgrief.com/
http://www.experienceproject.com/stories/Am-A-Widow/1537812

Shock and Forcing Emotions

Initial Shock of Grief

For Aidan, I wanted there to be this feeling that he was trying too hard to stay in control and not cry, because even when Sky was alive, he was composed and never cried, and because of his childhood, he toughened up.

So I looked first into how I could incorporate this by showing the symptoms of initial shock, by having him standing over a sink after having vomited. He won't be seen vomiting, but he will be trying to keep himself composed. (This will also set up the bathroom for later scenes).

"Sudden loss may put the body into shock. You will feel numb and disoriented. Some individuals go into denial, pretend the loss did not happen or may want to see proof that the loss did in fact occur. Nausea, vomiting, shaking, chills and fainting are all symptoms of shock. After the initial shock of the event, it is common for depression to begin. Excessive fatigue, laziness, isolation, loss of appetite and sadness are signs of depression. Depression is a normal feeling during the grieving process, but in the extreme, the individual might experience suicidal thoughts or the inability to move on and function. This is complicated grief because the individual is stuck in the beginning stage of grief."

With this there is also this element of denial, and for the later scene, Aidan tries to forget Sky by removing anything that reminds Aidan of him.

Forcing Youself Not To Cry

In response to this, I looked into what happens when someone who is grieving tries to fight the feelings they really want to express, such as crying and trying not to do so.

"My concern is not whether you ever cry, but whether you try to force feelings to stay inside of you. We personally have known thousands of people who made themselves sick because they didn't tell the truth about how they felt – with or without crying."

Alongside forcing himself not to cry, he eventually tries to move on too soon through the spiritual events where a blue scarf appears and a coat keeps dropping to the floor. With these events, Aidan is reminded of Sky, whereas everything else was blended in to the background at this stage and he hadn't noticed. But it is the blue scarf that does it, as Aidan knows this was Sky's favourite scarf, and if this reminds him of Sky, then everything else will as well.

"When you lose someone you love, and try to “move on” too soon, you end up hurting yourself because the above transformations don’t have a chance to take place."

And because of him trying too quickly to forget, he ends up causing himself a breakdown. Of course the film would work much more if there was a longer time limit, but with the restrictions, time jumps are an option.

Links:
http://www.ehow.co.uk/list_7646581_signs-complicated-grief.html
http://www.tributes.com/grief_recovery_center/featured_answer/124
https://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20110825182936AAQi5pm
http://mindfulconstruct.com/2008/12/11/moving-on-from-loss-through-grief/
https://books.google.co.uk/books?id=plMxKFs7QhYC&pg=PA8&lpg=PA8&dq=forcing+yourself+not+to+cry+grief&source=bl&ots=oYBJXP9c9J&sig=K7oTC6X5WQQVJABNs5n6srmvkEc&hl=en&sa=X&ei=L4kZVd3QFszeOMClgdAI&ved=0CFUQ6AEwDDgK#v=onepage&q=forcing%20yourself%20not%20to%20cry%20grief&f=false

Colour Symbolism

A theme that I had in mind was to use a colour to express the character and the behaviour of that character. One colour that has always struck me, and is one of the reasons I'm using it, is Teal (or Turquoise). The symbolism of teal is that of:

"The color turquoise helps opening lines of communication between the heart and the spoken word. It is a friendly and happy color that is enjoying life. In color psychology, it controls and heals the emotions, creating emotional balance and stability. In this process, it can feel like an emotional rollercoaster that goes up and down, until it balances itself. Overusing the effect of turquoise color meaning can lead to emotional stress."

From this, I thought I would start with a minimal amount of teal, then slowly increase its appearance through the film, leading to a build up of stress. The description works well with how Aidan would feel during grief, where he bottles up his emotions to a point where he serves to have a breakdown.

http://www.functionalcolour.ca/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/education-spectrum-teal.jpg

In a broader spectrum, the colour Blue would also be a good symbolism presence in the film.

In terms of complementary colours, I looked at how the colour teal would work against opposing colours, or colours that would work well with it.

Here are a few examples:

https://thestylenote.files.wordpress.com/2014/05/screen-shot-2014-05-27-at-6-16-57-pm.png

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/20/0f/d4/200fd4172568231236ef4fe87deba438.jpg

http://www.belleandsebastien.ca/img/tealcoral.jpg

The one colour that stands out as being the most complementary colour to teal is an orange peach colour.

http://www.rattanfurnitureinc.net/Onlinecommerce.jpg

One website described this type of orange colour as:

"Different shade, tints, and hues of orange have meanings. For example, dark orange may represent deceit and distrust, while red-orange relates to passion, pleasure, desire, aggression, domination, and action, and a golden orange often stands for prestige, wisdom, illumination, wealth, and quality. A light orange or peach color tend to be more friendly and soothing."

Another website describes 'peach':

"The meanings of Peach tell us that we might be relying too heavily on others to help us with our life and problems even to the point of manipulating them to take care of us because we are afraid we won't get our needs met. Use the Energy Healing Properties of the Color Peach when you have lost your kind, true self and need to restore your sparkle...Pride keeps us fighting even when there is no cause. Sometimes when in Peach, we assume a stance."

When you apply Teal and Peach together, as complementary colours, we see that Sky's 'teal' is a reassurance on the fear to Aidan's 'peach'. Because also the calming influence of teal is a heavy colour throughout the film, when they are taken away (as Sky brought many things in teal), we start to see Aidan's fear coming through, and he realises that by taking Sky out of his life, he is essentially bringing himself to breaking point. Through his grief he believed that by getting rid of anything that would remind him of Sky meant that he could move on. However, the 'Impression' that Sky left behind meant that Aidan was left emptier, and he inevitably felt worse.

Links:

http://www.color-wheel-pro.com/color-meaning.html

Blue
http://www.empower-yourself-with-color-psychology.com/color-blue.html
http://www.colormatters.com/blue

Turquoise/Teal
http://www.empower-yourself-with-color-psychology.com/color-turquoise.html
http://www.color-meanings.com/turquoise-color-meaning-the-color-turquoise/

Peach/Orange
http://www.bourncreative.com/meaning-of-the-color-orange/
http://www.old-earth.com/chapter-peach.html

Differences Between Broken Heart Syndrome and a Heart Attack

Because I wanted to really emphasise that Aidan dies from broken heart syndrome, it was critical that any sign he died from a heart attack were lessened. So I looked into the causes of heart attacks, and noted the lifestyle choices that were linked to them, making sure that Aidan steered clear of them. For example, eating healthily, exercise, not being obese, high salt and sugar intake, all of these were not a defining factor to Aidan's life. He is a healthy man, who lives well and takes care of himself.

The house should reflect this, such as having fruit in the bowl, having jogging gear in the bedroom and trainers in the hall, a gym membership card, having any alcohol tucked at the back of a cupboard, few junk foods.

From 'A Single Man', a film that has inspired 'Impression', George's death at the end comes from a heart attack, which is apparent when he shows signs of pain in his arm. With broken heart syndrome, there is only chest pain, and no pain comes from any other part of the body.

With 'Impression', Aidan will already be dead when he and Sky begin talking in the final scene. His death comes when he feels the last chest pain, which is very severe, and the sounds and colours begin to change around him.

Links:
http://www.nhlbi.nih.gov/health/health-topics/topics/heartattack/risks
http://www.nhs.uk/Conditions/Heart-attack/Pages/Causes.aspx
http://www.nhs.uk/conditions/Blood-pressure-(high)/Pages/Introduction.aspx

Aidan and Sky's Age Gap

With the character of Aidan, I wanted him to be isolated, and with that I thought about how Sky's parents may disapprove of their son going out with him. Sky's background is of upper-middle class and he is an only child, so naturally his parents would want to make sure he has the best life possible, and even want him to be happy, so his sexuality wasn't much of an issue, although his mother would likely not want to have any grandchildren (she thinks grandchildren make people older than they should).

However, when Sky begins a relationship with Aidan, I want Sky's parents not to approve (even though they're fine with Sky being in a same-sex relationship). So what I thought was for there to be a large age gap, one that would shock Sky's parents and altogether make them dislike Aidan for staying with Sky. Aidan would also have suggested that their relationship can't happen, but his nature would be overridden by Sky's as Sky was adamant to stay with Aidan.

The age gap wouldn't be incredibly large, such as recent newly-weds Stephen Fry and Elliot Spencer, whose age gap is 30 years, it would be more like the age gap was aiming towards Aidan being the same age as Sky's parents, to which they would of course try and persuade Sky to find someone else, and they would try and get Aidan to break off the relationship.

And although age-gaps are frequent in celebrity couples, they aren't always the most stable. But for non-celebrity couples, particularly same-sex couples, there have been studies to show they they are happier. In contrast, same-sex couples are statistically happier than heterosexual couples, who have a higher rate of divorce or separation.

Links:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2909179/Would-age-gap-romance-Stephen-Fry-marries-man-30-years-junior-FEMAIL-examines-pros-cons-Hollywood-s-inter-generational-relationships.html

http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/health-news/the-key-to-a-happy-relationship-be-gay-or-childless-or-make-tea-9057349.html

Fake Alcohol in Films

One idea I had for the character of Aidan is to show the drastic transition between the time the film starts and the time he starts to witness Sky's paranormal activity. As with grief comes depression and there are mentions of people turning to alcohol, which I thought could be established by having a side-board or dresser that has bottles of alcohol on them at the beginning and then find that many are missing, with the empty remains scattered around the house. Aidan would likely attribute the activity of Sky's spirit to being drunk. Alcohol is also one of the contributing factors towards heart failure (or as we have Takotsubo cardiomyopathy which is also caused by failing health).

So I looked into ways to create fake alcohol on set. One of them would be water for Vodka, another would be using water but colouring it with food colouring to make Whiskey. Other ways for Whiskey is using apple juice or ice tea.

Links

http://www.quora.com/Do-actors-actually-drink-alcohol-during-the-scenes

http://www.businessinsider.com/drugs-and-alcohol-in-movies-2012-4?op=1&IR=T

Visual Style

Inspiration for the visual style of my film.

Images used:

The Duchess (2008)

Good Will Hunting (1997)

Notting Hill (1999)

Sherlock (2010)

Downton Abbey (2010)

Doctor Who (2005)

Call the Midwife (2012)

Little Dorrit (2008)

Felix Character Name Change

I've been giving some thought to the name Felix for the main character, and as I have already stated, he's from a working class family in Boston. The name, to me, while it does fit the bill on opposing his character traits, doesn't fit his background. So I began looking into names that would suit more working-class family life, such names that don't sound overly 'posh' to a sense.

Some of the names I have thought might work are Kai, Kaiden, and Aidan. The one I think works best is Kai, as the name holds different meanings in different cultures, for example, it means 'fire' in Scotland, but in Hawaii it means 'ocean'. The other name, Kaiden means 'companion', which I feel would work as well, as it is meaningful to his relationship with Sky. Another meaning is 'warrior/fighter'.

Aiden/Aidan works well too, as the meaning of it is 'fiery/little fire'.

Another name I found was Ethan, meaning 'solid/enduring', 'firm/strong'

The reason behind creating a 'working class' character is to create a dynamic between him and Sky, who grew up in an upper-middle class environment, so they are pretty much polar opposites. Yet there is still an element of grace about the names, which allows the join the rank of trying to overcome stereotypes in the film (eg. name stereotypes and gay stereotypes).

Links

http://www.sheknows.com/baby-names/name/kai

http://www.babynamespedia.com/meaning/Kai/m

http://www.babynamespedia.com/meaning/Kaiden

http://www.thinkbabynames.com/meaning/1/Kaiden

http://www.ourbabynamer.com/meaning-of-Kaiden.html

http://www.babycenter.com/baby-names-aiden-462535.htm

http://www.sheknows.com/baby-names/name/aidan

http://www.behindthename.com/name/ethan

http://www.babynames.com/name/Ethan

http://nameberry.com/babyname/Ethan

Sky's Death

The character of Sky is, from the beginning, already dead. His death prior to the film was caused when he stopped at a T-Junction waiting to turn left, when a lorry coming from the left fell asleep at the wheel and hit Sky's car head-on as Sky was about to turn. He is killed instantly (as it is put across when he and Felix are 'talking' at the end), but the link here is that Felix is a freelance mechanic and often has to be called out to fix lorries which have broken down.

I looked into real-life stories about people who had died because of manslaughter on the fault of the lorry driver, or those who had died in car collisions that weren't their fault.

The fact that Sky's death is so sudden doesn't allow Felix to say goodbye, and it is likely that the state of Sky's body would have been horribly disfigured, that Felix feels that he couldn't go and see him one last time in the morgue.

He undoubtedly wishes it had been him instead, as he was older and Sky was young enough to keep going with his hard-earned career as a History teacher, but he also blames himself, as he is a mechanic who is often called out to fix lorries which have broken down, leading him to think that if he hadn't gone out to them, (as the lorry which hit Sky's car could have been one Felix fixed), Sky might still be alive.

Links
http://www.viperguard.co.uk/information/41-corporate-manslaughter/67-a-reminder-to-hgv-operators-that-failure-to-discharge-their-duties-could-lead-to-a-manslaughter-prosecution-if-death-occurs
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/crime/11417200/Bath-truck-crash-Two-men-arrested-on-suspicion-of-manslaughter.html
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-31499753

Character Development Part 4

Name
- Felix Isaacs
D.O.B./Zodiac
- 7^th October 1977/Libra
Hair
- Dark Brown
Eyes
- Brown
Height
- 6ft 3in
Weight
- 11st
Skin
- Slight Sun Tan
Nationality
- English
Sexuality
- Homosexual
Mother
- Laura Wakefield
Father
- Charlie Isaacs
Sibling(s)
- 2 older sisters: Alix, Beatrix
Place of birth
- Boston, Lincolnshire
Current Location
- Skellingthorpe, Lincoln
Education
- GCSE's, Mechanic Apprentice
Occupation
- Freelance Mechanic
Religion
- Agnostic
Car
- Black Vauxhall Corsa
Favourite Food
- Lasagne with Spicy Wedges
Favourite Drink
- Cola
Favourite Colour
- Blue
Favourite Place
- Cromer, Norfolk
Hobbies
- Photography
Favourite Film
- The Dark Knight
Favourite TV Show
- Wheeler Dealers
Favourite Band/Music
- P!nk

Name
- Sky Drew-Rogers
D.O.B./Zodiac
- 29th January 1986/Aquarius
Hair
- Light Brown
Eyes
- Grey-Blue
Height
- 5ft 11in
Weight
- 10st
Skin
- Fair
Nationality
- British
Sexuality
- Bisexual
Mother
- Melanie Rogers (American)
Father
- William Drew (English)
Sibling(s)
- 0 (Only Child)
Place of birth
- London
Current Location
- Skellingthorpe, Lincoln
Education
- BA Hons History, PGCE
Occupation
- History Teacher
Religion
- Christian/Unitarian
Car
- Silver Peugeot 208
Favourite Food
- Country Cake
Favourite Drink
- Tea
Favourite Colour
- Red
Favourite Place
- The Great Central Railway, Loughborough
Hobbies
- Railways
Favourite Film
- Oh, Mr. Porter!
Favourite TV Show
- Downton Abbey
Favourite Band/Music
- Noel Coward

Character Design Inspiration

Here are a few images which inspired the character's styles and appearances. Follow up drawings will be done based on these inspirations.

Felix Isaacs

Felix's design is based on quite modern but casual clothing designs. The colours are dark and not in any way trying to stand out or individual. His hairstyle is short and quickly styled without much consideration for what is 'in'. The clothes are very worn and comfortable instead of trying to keep up with new trends.

Sky Drew-Rogers

Sky's style is heavily inspired by vintage clothing from around the 1930's. Again there are quite dark colours, but he is attracted to colours like greens, reds, and browns. His hair is not quite as short as Felix's, but rather has a natural curl. As he is a History teacher, he knows the fashions of the eras and is subconsciously drawn to the styles of the time, although he adds his own modern twist to it (probably influenced by Felix in that respect).

Also just a quick note to show how I envision Aidan:

Tom Burke

Links
http://www.sunspel.com/media/catalog/product/cache/4/image/9df78eab33525d08d6e5fb8d27136e95/6/0/6033_354.jpg
http://cdn2.picvpicimg.com/pics/6518644/orange-red-herring-dark-orange-zip-through-sweatshirt.jpg
http://image.dhgate.com/albu_273683699_00/1.0x0.jpg
http://www.zappos.com/images/z/2/6/3/7/2/3/2637237-p-4x.jpg
http://www.yourmomhatesthis.com/images/Mens-Jeans-sppels.jpg
http://www.becauseclothing.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/Mens-Polo-Shirts.jpg
http://www.blueinc.co.uk/images/twisted-soul-mens-grey-casual-polo-shirt-p18436-9426_zoom.jpg
http://topmenhairstyles.com/mens-hairstyles-short-sides-long-top-2014/mens-hairstyles-short-sides-long-top-2014/
http://image.dhgate.com/albu_328013691_00-1.0x0/2013-spring-new-men-039-s-casual-shoes-britpop.jpg

http://fashionbelieve.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/Dress-Shirt-with-Sweater-Vest.jpg
http://companymanvintage.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/01/1940s-50s-vest.jpg
http://images.shopmadeinchina.com/9ABAACE1CDF4E37EE040007F01006991/497/6612497/VANCL-Classic-Solid-Sweater-Vest-MEN-Wine-SKU-7787_6612497.bak.jpg
http://image0-rubylane.s3.amazonaws.com/shops/mairemcleod/2188.1L.jpg
https://img1.etsystatic.com/000/0/5702188/il_570xN.275716533.jpg
http://i234.photobucket.com/albums/ee136/suwarnaadi/hair/WilliamClarkGableHairstyle.jpg
http://www.fashionima.com/2014-hairstyles-for-mens.html/latest-hairstyles-for-men-2014
http://www.hairstyleses.com/hairstyle-man-2014-pictures/most-popular-hairstyle-for-man-2014/
http://vignette1.wikia.nocookie.net/marvelmovies/images/9/91/Tom_Hiddleston.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20120713125320
http://static5.shop.indiatimes.com/images/products/additional/original/B2139179_View_1/fashion/trousers-chinos/basics-brown-men-casual-trousers-12btr27873.jpg
http://static4.shop.indiatimes.com/images/products/additional/original/B969495_View_1/fashion/trousers-chinos/genesis-brown-men-trouser-11gtr25400.jpg
https://lindyshopper.files.wordpress.com/2010/04/lg_lateapril_063.jpg
http://static.fashionbeans.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/02/corn3-260x400.jpg

Character Compatability

One thing that has often fascinated me is the compatibility between two people. Zodiac/Star Signs are not necessarily reliable in their interpretations of individuals, but there is an element of significance to how people are able to get along. So what I thought was that I would base some aspects of my characters on their star signs, adding a depth to their history/backgrounds.

For the character of Felix, he needs to be the type of man who is very introverted, but comfortable around Sky, so I thought about people I knew who had these qualities, and what their star signs were. There are a couple of people I know, both men, who share the same quiet qualities as I had in mind for Felix, and both were Libra. 

Libra traits:

Libra, the 7th Sign of the Zodiac, is represented by the symbol of the Balancing Scales. Naturally, the buzzword here is ‘Balance’. Unsurprisingly, most Libra individuals are balancers – of varying degrees. Also, since a pair of Scales always has two aspects, two sides – Libra-born too has two sides to his/ her personality and thinking. Yet, unlike Gemini, the most Libra individuals don’t let this aspect rule their personalities. They are, rather, what you would call, as ‘the weighing options and then deciding (and picking the peaceful option) kinds’. They value fairness and justice above most things, and are natural soothers and harmonizers. On their own, most Libras will steer clear of conflict or arguments, and would also not prefer to create or cause conflicts and disagreements. Owing to this trait, they make for good team players. Friendly, amiable and attractive, Libra individuals are also quite popular among their friends, more so because they tend to play able, trustworthy and balanced team strategists for their groups. However, many a Libra are found to be too manipulative or stubborn – for their own good. They can be critical of others’ ways, fixed in their own or may be too manipulative; and, they can be quite difficult to manage, once they get into any of these modes. Good thing is that most Libra-born are able to effectively reign in this side of their personality, rather using the gift of tact and diplomacy to get positive results. In relationships, the Scales or Libra are very loving and careful. They make for beautiful, elegant partners, always well turned out, and are a treat to be taken along on dates, parties and social dos. Most Libra-born are graceful, polite and admire beauty in all its forms. They love a good life!

So I then took this star sign as the one I would use for Felix, and started to look into the star signs that would work, not just as a compatibility for a Libra man, but also for the character of Sky. The star sign that works best with Libra is Aquarius, and it suits the personality of Sky very well (although some traits are set against the story). 

Aquarius traits:

Aquarius is the 11th Sign of the Zodiac. A symbol of all that’s humane and humanity, this Sign is modern, independent and freedom loving. While everything new and new-age enthralls the Aquarius natives, rebelliousness of any sort liberates them. Aquarius is known as the Sign of discoverers, inventors, adventurers and visionaries. Amiable and cheery by disposition, Aquarius-born tend to have a plenty of social charm. Yet, they lack the depth required to strike and cultivate truly profound relationships. That is why, the Aquarius natives may have a lot of acquaintances, but may have a very few close friends. Their social charm, nonetheless, in non-negotiable, and they are also, very often, perceived as pretty attractive by the opposite sex. But, again in love, the Aquarius may never feel as immersed as a Pisces will – for to them (Aquarius) it’s the whole wide world that’s important and vital. Most of them, thus, have a mission or a larger cause on their mind. Even if some Aquarius may seem to lead an entirely mundane life, on some digging, you would find that they have attached, somehow, themselves to a charitable cause. Generous and compassionate, the Aquarius, however, are very different from Pisces or Cancer – the other two Signs, perceived as very kind. Aquarius are more practical, and have a keen eye, which is easily able to see through deception and betrayal. Nonetheless, as parents, spouses or friends, Aquarius-born are very supportive and encouraging; they also are often ‘the go to frontier’ for many – the ones (Aquarius) who will always be ready to help with genuine, unbiased advice and a practically contagious optimism

The compatibility between Libra and Aquarius is high as well, and given their differences, they work very well together. Because they are both Air signs, this also eludes to the idea of the ending of the story (and the whole 'Impression' symbolism I spoke of earlier) whereby they are both dead at the end (their spirits are nothing but in the air).

As I say, these background character qualities are merely for development, but they may become more apparent when the characters are interacting.

Links

http://www.ganeshaspeaks.com/libra.action

http://www.ganeshaspeaks.com/aquarius.action
http://www.psychicguild.com/zodiac-compatibility/Libra
http://zodiacchic.tumblr.com/post/53236625175

http://www.astrology.com/love-compatibility-aquarius-libra/2-d-lvmt-aquarius_libra

Words and Names

Here is a list of the words and names which hold relevance to to the film and characters.

Impression

• an idea or opinion of what something or someone is like
• to think that something is true, especially when it is not
• the way that something seems, looks, or feels to a particular person
• an attempt at copying another person's manner and speech, etc., especially in order to make people laugh
• a mark made on the surface of something by pressing anobject onto it
• all the copies of a book that have been printed at the same time without any changes being made

This word is symbolic, not only to what was left behind by Sky, but also the impression he made to other people that made them remember him. How Felix remembers him and the ghost-like effect Sky has after his death on Felix. Felix touches Sky's side of the bed, he gets out two cups for a cup of tea, he notices Sky's toothbrush, he can smell Sky's fragrance on clothing, he can't get away from Sky because he left so much of himself behind, through clothes, books, perfumes, even written words and texts.

Felix Isaacs

The name Felix means 'lucky' or 'successful', which is very contradictory to Felix's life, as he was abused by his parents, and he didn't have a brilliant education. He had basic English and Maths, but his only success was through an apprenticeship. Then when he does find someone to be with, they are taken away from him.

The name Isaacs, while a surname, can be used as a forename meaning 'he who laughs'. In the film, he only laughs when Sky is talking to him at the end.

Sky Drew

The meaning of the name Sky is old Norse for 'cloud', which is in connection to his death. At the end of the film, the scene fades to white, which symbolises Heaven. The name Sky is also linked to a musical background. Sky's mother is a musicals fan and named him after the character 'Sky Masterson' from 'Guys and Dolls'. She wanted him to pursue a life of acting or music (trying to mold him into a star), however, he wasn't interested and instead chose something more mundane as Teaching. While he was more into railways and history, he wasn't keen on musicals. It is also quite a feminine name, and perhaps his mother hoped he wouldn't end up marrying a woman and having children (she hated the idea of becoming a grandmother as she felt this would make her feel old). While he did end up with Felix, Sky does identify as bisexual, so he could have potentially been a father.

His surname 'Drew' is an undertone to his death. The name means 'ghost' or 'phantom'.

Links

http://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/british/impression

http://www.behindthename.com/name/felix

http://www.behindthename.com/name/isaac

http://www.behindthename.com/name/sky

http://www.surnamedb.com/Surname/Drew

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0048140/fullcredits/

Videos on Grief

I thought I would do some research into grief by looking up videos. This will enable real experiences and help to influence my character.

The Grieving Process: Coping with Grief

]

How To Deal With Grief

https://vimeo.com/27229362

D.A.B.D.A.

Denial, Anger, Bargain, Depression, and Acceptance.

These 5 stages of Grief are part of a process which came from Dr. Elisabeth Kubler-Ross (DABDA is also known as the 'Kubler-Ross' model), which studies the various forms of grief and structures it into a process which is understandable. However, the model is not something that HAS to be followed. One or all of the stages can apply to my character, but they don't have to come in that order. Kubler-Ross even states that she never meant for the stages to be taken in that order, and it doesn't always apply to everyone.

While the topic of my film is a serious one, I found a funny video to explain the Kubler-Ross model in a way of understanding a difficult event.

The DABDA process also appears in two books I loaned from the library, 'The Grief Recovery Handbook' (chapter 2), and 'Living with Loss'.

Links
http://dying.about.com/od/thedyingprocess/a/DABDA.htm

Character Development Part 3 - Questionnaire

I have filled out a Character Development questionnaire which gives details into the character's personality and background.

Felix Isaacs

(This questionnaire is found in Gotham Writers’ Workshop’s Writing Fiction.)

You might start with questions that address the basics about a character:

• What is your character’s name? Does the character have a nickname?

Felix Isaacs

• What is your character’s hair colour? Eye colour?

Black hair, brown eyes.

• What kind of distinguishing facial features does your character have?

Quite large eyebrows with slender eyes.

• Does your character have a birthmark? Where is it? What about scars? How did he get them?

No birthmarks. A scar on his leg from falling from a tree he was climbing.

• Who are your character’s friends and family? Who do they surround themselves with? Who are the people your character is closest to? Who does he wish he were closest to?

Mother: Laura Wakefield, Father: Charlie Isaacs. He doesn't surround himself with many people, he is quite introverted. He is closest to his partner, Sky Drew. He wishes he could have been closer to his family.

• Where was your character born? Where have they lived since then? Where do they call home?

Felix was born in Boston, Lincolnshire. He has lived there and in the local area all his life. He moved when he was thrown out of his home by his parents. He lived with an elderly foster lady who died when he was 17. He found work as an apprentice mechanic. He moved to Newark-on-Trent when he qualified. He finally settled in the outskirts of Lincoln with Sky.

• Where does your character go when they're angry?

He goes outside and sits quietly.

• What is their biggest fear? Who have they told this to? Who would they never tell this to? Why?

His biggest fear is letting people in. He wasn't much good at making friends and was isolated most of his life. When he does let someone in he's still cautious, but he feels great loneliness. He told this to Sky when they had been going out for 3 years when Sky asked why he didn't have any close friends or family. He would never tell anyone he didn't know well, because he would think they would use it against him in some way.

• Do they have a secret?

He doesn't really have secrets but he is quiet and doesn't talk much.

• What makes your character laugh out loud?

Sky when he's being silly.

• When has your character been in love? Had a broken heart?

He has only ever been in love with Sky. He did have a brief relationship with another man which lead to his being kicked out by his family.

Then dig deeper by asking more unconventional questions:

• What is in your character’s refrigerator right now? On their bedroom floor? On their night stand? In their garbage can?

Milk, yoghurt (Sky's), chocolate, cheese, jams, butter, three week old decomposing vegetables, left-overs. On the bedroom floor is a rug, used socks. On the night stand is a lamp, and alarm clock, and a photo of him and Sky. In the garbage can is the hoover dust, dinner, teabags.

• Look at your character’s feet. Describe what you see there. Do they wear dress shoes, gym shoes, or none at all? Are they in socks that are ratty and full of holes? Or are they wearing a pair of blue and gold slippers knitted by their grandmother?

His socks are worn but still in good use. They are black and thick.

• When your character thinks of their childhood kitchen, what smell do they associate with it? Sauerkraut? Oatmeal cookies? Paint? Why is that smell so resonant for them?

The smell he remembers is the combined smell of washing liquid and cigarette smoke. He associates this smell with his parents. Any smell of food was usually take-away (which he didn't get much of), and that was then covered by the cigarettes.

• Your character is doing intense spring cleaning. What is easy for them to throw out? What is difficult for them to part with? Why?

He doesn't own a great deal of clothes, any that he has he wears a lot. The only things he'd probably get rid off is underwear and things that don't fit any more (unless Sky gets in there and demands clothes that are no longer fit for outings to be used for work).

• It’s Saturday at noon. What is your character doing? Give details. If they're eating breakfast, what exactly do they eat? If they're stretching out in their backyard to sun, what kind of blanket or towel do they lie on?

Felix would likely be helping Sky tidy the house and cleaning. If he gets that done he'd go and do some much needed DIY outside (out of Sky's way). If that's done, he'd fiddle about with his cars and mechanic work.
The kind of breakfast he'd have would be a large bowl of whatever cereal is available (he's not fussy...Sky usually chooses it and it's usually healthy muesli). When he gets a chance to 'relax' he wouldn't sit outside, he'd be inside watching TV on the sofa. At the beach however, he'd lie on a towel chosen by Sky.

• What is one strong memory that has stuck with your character from childhood? Why is it so powerful and lasting?

One of the strongest is when he was dragged into the house when he got home from school and beaten by his dad. The sounds he doesn't really remember because it was just noise, but it had something to do with him being involved with another man. Felix ran out, thinking he'd come back and explain everything when they'd calmed down, only to find all his things packed and stood outside the front door. He never made contact with his family after that.

• Your character is getting ready for a night out. Where are they going? What do they wear? Who will they be with?

He goes with Sky to a social gathering with music (maybe a friend's wedding). He wears a white shirt with a tie, black trousers, and shiny black shoes. 

Sky Drew

You might start with questions that address the basics about a character:

• What is your character’s name? Does the character have a nickname?

Sky Drew

• What is your character’s hair colour? Eye colour?

Light Brown hair, Grey-Blue eyes.

• What kind of distinguishing facial features does your character have?

Slender eyebrows with large eyes. He also has a few small moles dotted about his face.

• Does your character have a birthmark? Where is it? What about scars? How did he get them?

He has a faded birthmark on his leg. He only has a few small scars on his arms and legs from childhood accidents when playing.

• Who are your character’s friends and family? Who do they surround themselves with? Who are the people your character is closest to? Who does he wish he were closest to?

Only child of: Mother: Melanie Rogers, Father: William Drew. He surrounds himself with friends and friends of friends, pretty much anyone. He is closest to his mother (despite her wish that he get into acting or music), his father (despite the initial reaction to his sexuality, they are close in their interest in railways), and Felix.

• Where was your character born? Where have they lived since then? Where do they call home?

Sky was born in London, where his parents were into property development. They moved when Sky was 5 to Lincolnshire near Sleaford and settled there. Sky moved out after earning a teaching degree in History. He moved to Lincoln until he met Felix. He moved in with him when he was 24.

• Where does your character go when they're angry?

He goes into the bathroom and locks himself inside.

• What is their biggest fear? Who have they told this to? Who would they never tell this to? Why?

His biggest fear is not being able to do everything he wants to do in life, such as go to places he longs to go to, or meet famous people, or achieving something in life he longs to do. He doesn't fear dying or death, he fears that he will run out of time doing mundane things (like running a house and job) instead of going out and seeing the world.

• Do they have a secret?

He first had sex when he was 14, which he never told his parents about. He told Felix, who swore he wouldn't tell anyone.

• What makes your character laugh out loud?

Felix...tickling him.

• When has your character been in love? Had a broken heart?

He had been in love with a girl called Amy who was a little older than him, and she was already going out with someone. He fell completely in love with Felix on their second...or third meet-up, especially when they kissed. Oh my God, that kiss.

Then dig deeper by asking more unconventional questions:

• What is in your character’s refrigerator right now? On their bedroom floor? On their night stand? In their garbage can?

Milk, yoghurt, chocolate, cheese, jams, butter, three week old decomposing vegetables, left-overs. On the bedroom floor is a rug, used socks. On the night stand is a lamp, and alarm clock, and a photo of him and Felix. In the garbage can is the hoover dust, dinner, teabags.

• Look at your character’s feet. Describe what you see there. Do they wear dress shoes, gym shoes, or none at all? Are they in socks that are ratty and full of holes? Or are they wearing a pair of blue and gold slippers knitted by their grandmother?

His socks are fluffy and colourful, but when he goes out in shoes, he puts on thinner plainer socks.

• When your character thinks of their childhood kitchen, what smell do they associate with it? Sauerkraut? Oatmeal cookies? Paint? Why is that smell so resonant for them?

The smell of paint and sawn wood. His parents were often re-decorating. Any food was prepared by a woman who came in and cooked for the family. (His parents made their money by renting the properties they developed).

• Your character is doing intense spring cleaning. What is easy for them to throw out? What is difficult for them to part with? Why?

Any clothes that are either too small or too worn must go.

• It’s Saturday at noon. What is your character doing? Give details. If they're eating breakfast, what exactly do they eat? If they're stretching out in their backyard to sun, what kind of blanket or towel do they lie on?

Saturday is spent tidying the house and cleaning. That usually takes up his time. Any 'free' time is spent marking work. If they chance to have nothing to do most of the day, he and Felix will go out and spend the day at a museum or take a walk in the countryside.

• What is one strong memory that has stuck with your character from childhood? Why is it so powerful and lasting?

One of the strongest memories he has is when he and his dad went to see a steam train coming through a village. This changed Sky to want to study history, in particular railways. He became influenced by early 20^th century fashion and style, and started to collect books and memorabilia on railways. From that day on his dad encouraged him to pursue a teaching career and encouraged the railway fascination.

• Your character is getting ready for a night out. Where are they going? What do they wear? Who will they be with?

He will usually go to see friends or a social gathering. He wears a short sleeved shirt with an open button at the top (no tie), with a dark tweed waistcoat. He wears dark trousers and sued shoes.

Relationship and Identity Research

I began investigating relationships and how they may come about and what effects/affects occur during and after.

Because the pairing is a same-sex pairing, I took out a book in the library about gay relationships and society (Sexual Orientation and Society). It explores the different dynamics of homosexuality and even stereotypes, which is something that fascinates me most about the story. What I want to portray is a non-stereotypical gay relationship that is almost heterosexual in its approach, in the way in which 'camp' gay couples are not so much excluded, but showing a relationship that isn't trying to be gay, which is something that the book explores in how certain TV channels have portrayed gay couples and individuals in an almost negative way, where the only outlook on them is a over-camp identity which many gay men don't identify with.

What I wanted was the main character to be indifferent to his identity, he has fallen in love with another man, but that doesn't mean he was going to suddenly start acting camp and change his personality to suit the identity of other's. The same goes for his partner, who, although is different in terms of preferences in fashion, isn't a fruity camp guy who has a fag-hag following and goes shopping and speaks with a lisp. He is however a lot more extroverted than the main character, which allows for him to be a little more cocky. The way I see him is a kind natured man with a lot of friends, but his focus is towards his man. The main character is much more introverted and doesn't have many friends (perhaps only through his partner) so his personality isn't as strongly expressed.

One article I read which was about straight men 'acting gay' really threw me off, because, while I can understand why it would be almost insulting for gay actors who can 'pull it off', there is an underlining of stereotyping of gay identity. The man who voiced his opinions came from Rory Cowan from Mrs Browns Boys (BBC). His character is gay and camp, however, there is also the argument of how gay actors are playing straight characters, so the argument is almost invalid. Sexual identity has nothing to do with lifestyle, which is something Cowan doesn't get across.

In my film I wanted to allow the character's sexuality to be the lesser of the film's theme. While I am determined to have a gay couple in the film, they aren't any less of a heterosexual normality, and that is what I want, I want them as a 'normal' couple, but the film dealing with a death. This is pushing forward the homosexual normality in media, which is becoming more prominent as people are slowly becoming more tolerant and accepting. But it is still taking time, and with semi-negative portrayals of gays in film and TV, it's something that needs to be put forward more, instead of relying on the stereotypes.

Links
http://www.goss.ie/2014/11/mrs-browns-boys-star-rory-cowan-straight-men-cant-act-gay/
http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/legacy/haveyoursay/2010/07/is_the_tv_portrayal_of_gay_and.html
http://www.stonewall.org.uk/documents/unseen_on_screen_web_final.pdf